FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

 What results can I expect from working with you?

My coaching is geared at helping you feel more confident in your love life. Progress or results are very much based on your emotional and mental mindset at the time we begin. In general, my clients fall into one of 3 areas: individuation, (confidence boosting & healing wounds), dating (looking for a partner), and relationships (creating a more secure bond with your current partner). Sometimes these areas will overlap. We'll track your progress by noting what thought patterns, beliefs, and intimate relationships you're dealing with when we start our work together and pay attention to the time it takes for you to adjust from your insecure ways of responding to your new, more secure ways of responding. The more you do this work, the quicker your secure response time will be. My clients who show up regularly and do the homework tend to see faster results in terms of more quality relationships.

How much time is involved outside of our sessions?

This depends on you. On average you can expect to have about 30 minutes to an hour's worth of "homework" to do in between sessions. This is to help you continue to move toward a more secure mindset outside of our sessions, where much of your progress will be made. I'll give you a handful of items to focus on after each session that will be tailored to your needs and you will ultimately decide what will be most useful to you. If you don't get everything done before our following session you can always go back and do it when you have time.

What if I don't like using the dating apps?

I'll tell you a secret: no one likes using the dating apps. They're a useful tool for meeting people quickly and I will teach you my tips & tricks for using them more effectively so that you can attract more secure, viable partners. However, what I teach is relevant no matter where you meet people and I'm happy to share other ways of meeting people outside of the dating apps, including on the online matchmaking company Tawkify, where I'm a Matchmaker & Dating Coach.

Do I need to be dating someone while we work together?

You don't need to be dating someone, no. We can spend our time together uncovering your shadows, getting clear on you past relationships, doing inner child work, reframing your mindset, and talking through trigger points. However, if you are wanting to date more seriously, I highly encourage that you do so alongside our sessions as dating brings up various attachment issues, which are served well when we can deal with them together in real time.

What’s the difference between a therapist and a coach?

Therapists and coaches have a lot in common but they aren’t exactly the same. A therapist is a professional licensed in diagnosing & treating mental health disorders. Coaches are not licensed (though many of us are certified!) and we do not treat or diagnose mental health disorders. In therapy there is a lot of focus on understanding your past and where your feelings come from. In coaching, while we may dip in to your past at times, we tend to be forward-focused and often more niche, providing you with tools and action plans aimed at achieving a specific goal or goals that will help you implement significant change. Both are helpful in their own ways and work well when done simultaneously or separately.

Do you work with LGBTQQIA folks?

YES! I have worked with several clients with diverse sexual orientations and gender identities and many of my closest friends identify as LGBTQQIA. I am a very vocal ally with a background supporting the queer community through my work directing and producing the Queer Fashion Show for three of my four years atUC Santa Cruz, a variety show that celebrated the queer community and raised funds for organizations that provide services and education for LGBTQQIA folks and their loved ones.

I'm a little scared of what I'll uncover. Is this work something I should be afraid of?

The nature of doing anything emotional or new can feel scary. However, you can rest easy knowing that I am well-informed in this work and will only push you as far as you are comfortable. I am big on respecting my client's boundaries so you can feel safe in exploring yourself and your relationships more deeply. As a trained coach and someone with an anxious attachment style, I'm very skilled at holding space for other people's emotions without judgment, and I have a whole toolkit of exercises and resources to help make this process as clear and smooth as possible. However, if you have deep, unresolved trauma, I always recommend doing this work alongside a licensed therapist or counselor for best results.

Should I schedule sessions weekly or every other week, and what if I have to cancel?

This is totally based on what's convenient for you. I find that a lot can happen in between sessions so sometimes clients who start out every other week move to weekly to get more regular support. This is a personal choice and can be changed if needed. Once you purchase a session(s) I will email you a link to my calendar to book the first one. Then, depending on how many sessions you sign up for, we will make a tentative schedule to get the rest of your sessions set. I know you have a busy life so I do my best to be flexible with cancellations. I do charge a $50 fee for no-shows (unless in case of emergency), but if you let me know a couple days before we can reschedule. I do ask that you try not to reschedule more than twice as it can disrupt the flow of the material and slow your progress.

Do you offer payment plans?

I offer a payment plan for my Lasting Love Coaching Package when you purchase it at its regular price (does not apply to sales). Payment plans can be given in two and three payments, with a small1% interest fee applied.

Have more questions? Email me directly at hello@truerlove.com!